I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
