can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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