You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
