Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
