if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I just gift wrapped bread.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Randomize
