Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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