How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I will be naked everywhere
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
