Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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