Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize