This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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