I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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