I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
