piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
