do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
