I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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