I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
