Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
