Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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