I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
