New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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