i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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