You're completely useless in the revolution.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
COCAINE IS GR8
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize