i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Randomize
