I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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