I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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