Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
