i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I cut my penus on the lid.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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