Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I queefed so loud it echoed.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize