god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
