last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I need to align my fucking chakras
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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