3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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