you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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