i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
