I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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