So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
