dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
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