i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize