We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
