Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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