Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
