just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
