I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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