i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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