Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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