i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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