I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
