hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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