allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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