i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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