nut hugger
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
