Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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